Are there problems in your relationship? Has the love disappeared? Are you afraid you might end up getting a divorce? Then try couples therapy before it’s too late.
When things go wrong in a relationship, it’s often because the habits, patterns and ways of being that each partner has brought into the relationship have slowly led to them drifting apart. This usually happens without you even realizing it. In couples therapy, we work to make visible what has gone wrong – what habits and patterns have pulled you away from each other. You learn to understand yourselves and your partner better. And you’ll learn what it takes to recreate the closeness, love and what you had together in the past.
Issues that can be worked on in couples therapy
Being in a relationship can be enriching, supportive and inspiring. It can also be exhausting and lead to great loneliness when the initial infatuation has subsided and the pressures of everyday life cause the couple to go it alone.
Typical problems in a troubled life include poor communication and arguments, fatigue, uneven division of responsibilities or work, disagreements about parenting, midtvejskrise, infidelity and a feeling of not being seen, heard and appreciated. This can make many people feel alone in the relationship and begin to wonder if they have grown apart. After a while, the sex life usually suffers. People try to survive by lowering expectations, shutting down their emotional needs and hoping that the crisis will pass on its own. It very rarely does!
Understand your relationship patterns
As your couples therapist, I help you get your relationship back on track. I work according to a well-documented method called Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy (EFT couple therapy) – a method that emphasizes understanding and unlearning old unhelpful patterns and creating a new, deeper and more loving way of being together.
In EFT couples therapy we work with:
- Your habits and behaviors
- Your emotions
- Your vulnerabilities and fears
- Your ways of protecting yourself (defenses)
- Your innermost wants and needs
- And last but not least: how you can change your behavior and perception of each other so you can better help and support each other to get the relationship you both long for.
You can read more about emotion-focused couple therapy under the Profile – Theory and Method tab and on the Danish Center for Emotion-Focused Couple Therapy’s website under emotion-focused couple therapy.
Help with clarification or closure
In some cases, you may not know if you want to continue in your relationship. A clarification process can help you make an informed and thoughtful decision about the future. A clarification process is a process where no in-depth therapy takes place. Instead, the focus is on clarifying your wishes and longings and the possibilities of fulfilling them. During this process, part of the work is done by me talking to both parties separately.
Couples therapy can help you move forward in life together. If that’s not possible, couples therapy can help you move on separately in an orderly way and with respect for the good that has been!
