Antje loves to be in nature. She often walks in the fields near her home.
Image: Marcus Kaufhold
When adult children break off contact with their parents, they have suffered for years beforehand. Breaking up hurts, but for some it’s the only way out. Two women tell why it freed them.
“Dad, I wish that you would accept my career aspirations. Dad, I don’t want advice from you all the time. Dad, I want to go hiking with you.” Ten years ago, Antje wrote her father a letter. Antje, then 49 years old, wrote down everything she hadn’t been able to say to her father. As she put the letter in an envelope, she felt relieved. And tense. How would the father react? For Antje it was clear: It is her last attempt to approach him.
At birth, a person enters into a relationship with their parents. According to sociology, the family is the long-term community of at least two generations. Most Germans find family to be a place of love and security. Family is an entity overflowing with ideals, suggest advice books and postcards with sayings like “Family is where life begins and love never ends”. No matter what happens, the bond between child and parent should never be broken. You separate from friends, lovers, spouses. But from mom and dad?
